Everyone knows about SCUDs. They’re the people who look like they might be very attractive from a distance but when they get closer, you realize they are of the opposite gender than originally assumed or have a face that would make Medusa grab a pocket mirror and turn herself into stone.
Take this one girl I ran into. From behind, you could definitely tell she was ‘goth’, but the frame and caboose suggested a little hottie. I ended up in an elevator with her. Much to my dismay, the chick had a face like a deep-dish pizza. Plus, and I’m not sure she was aware of it but it looked like she had a #10 ball bearing hanging off of her lip / cheek area. Like she wanted a nose piercing and the dude at The Piercing Pagoda was blind in one eye and couldn’t see too good out the other.
Look, I’m not God’s gift to women (more of a token of good will, really) but damn there are some ugly people in this world.
rolled out on
Monday, May 16, 2005 2:23 PM