Top 10 Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch the RNC

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Top 10 Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch the RNC

10. Tivo the entire Facts of Life series and count the number of times Natalie sneaks off stage for a twinkie break (double checking for accuracy!)

9. Take a ball peen hammer to my incisors and upper bicuspids

8. Prank phone call Jeff G. repeatedly. Ask him if "everything's kosher", cackle loudly, then hang up.

7. Rewrite the entire Patriot Act in ig-pay atin-lay.

6. Volunteer for Mall Security duty. Show up in full fatigues and ask when do I get to pepper spray some punk kid's ass? Talk in whispers to my baton.

5. Find out exactly how much Viagra is "too much"

4. Try out new and exciting recipes that call for half a cup of ear wax

3. Photoshop lots of images of rutabagas in compromising positions.

2. Learn Braille on a waffle iron.

and finally

1. Watch reruns of the DNC

rolled out on Monday, August 30, 2004 1:50 PM

Comments

# RE: Top 10 Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch the RNC - Robb Allen

Rolled Out On: 8/31/2004 9:37 PM

Don't worry about it Mary. I just feel both conventions are hyped up circus events. I don't need prepared speeches to woo me, I need honesty and action, not words.

# RE: Top 10 Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch the RNC - mary

Rolled Out On: 8/31/2004 12:48 AM

I am surprised that you would not watch the convention. why?? as a bush suported I plan watching the whole think on c-span without the media liberal comments. I just watched the first night and the speeches were great. If you did not watch you really missed out.

# RE: Top 10 Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch the RNC - mary

Rolled Out On: 8/31/2004 12:51 AM

oh gosh, after reading what I just sent I sound like a jerk. My spelling was terrible!! since it's almost 1:00 in the morning maybe I should get off this computer. too much watching this convention and up too late. ha!