Wrap 'em in meat!.
Yes ladies and gentlemen, when it comes time to enjoy asparagus, nothing beats coating them in olive oil, kosher salt, and pepper, then wrapping their little green carcasses in partially cooked bacon and shoving them in a 425° oven for 12 minutes.
Nothing.
My oldest daughter runs around the house all excited when we make asparagus. It's her favorite. She ate two of those bundles you see up there.
Oh, how the tips simply turn crispy and how the fat from the bacon just absorbs into the green flesh. When the bacon is all cooked, you can eat the whole bundle with your fingers. As a side dish for bratwurst and baby red mashed potatoes, it can't be beat.
Yeah, sure my cholesterol jumped up 12 points or so, but damn was it worth it.