Dear Miller,
I am writing to inform you that I will no longer purchase any of your products. Many people are offended that you are openly supporting illegal immigration. This is an abhorrent move on your company's part as there are plenty of legal ways to immigrate into this country and you are actively encouraging people to break the law.
However, this is not the reason I am boycotting your product line. I refuse to purchase your beer because it resembles chilled piss from a horse who has barely survived on a fairly anemic diet of crabgrass and forced to consume its own manure for variety in flavor. To me, the phrase "Miller Time" means a trip to the bathroom with a severe case of the trots. I once put Miller Lite into my dog's water bowl. He spent most of the evening licking his ass trying to get the taste out of his mouth.
Sincerely,Robb Allen
I refuse to purchase your beer because it resembles chilled piss from a horse who has barely survived on a fairly anemic diet of crabgrass and forced to consume its own manure for variety in flavor.