So there's this whole brouhaha about some Whitehouse staffer being 'reportedly' seen at a gay bar and that's supposed to be big news? That's what it takes to become a top-level reporter? Kick ass, because I know someone else who, as a conservative type person also went to a gay bar on a regular occasion and I'm about to out him!!!
Ladies and Gentlemen (and you too Nathan), I, Robb Allen, CEO and Editor of Sharp as a Marble used to frequent a gay bar in Tampa many years ago. I admit it freely.
I had a friend of mine (Barry) who would go with me to Traxx on Thursdays for several reasons. One, it was "Straight Night" or as I liked to call it, New Recruit Night. Second, they had kick ass drink specials. Third, one of the bartenders had the hots for either Barry or myself. Didn't care who because he'd give us two for ones on some highly alcoholic beverages. Fourth, the chicks who wanted to be all cool and hang out at a gay bar were generally smoking hot. Not only were they hot, most of them were uncomfortable being in a gay bar, no matter what they told their friends. And Barry & I were comfortable enough with our hetero-ness that we weren't threatened by it and that translated into, erm.... well, lets just say that uncomfortable, hot chicks take to confident straight guys in a gay bar rather quickly.
So there you have it. I hung out, rather plastered most of the time, at a gay bar to pick up chicks.
In today's times, apparently that's all the proof you need to be considered homosexual. I guess that means bad news for my wife, my daughter, and the new one on the way. Even though I find men to be totally unattractive and that a nice set of breasts and child bearing hips on a woman turns my head.
And those rumors that I offered to exchange sexual favors for a spicy, smoked chipotle bean dip from Jeff Goldstein? Totally inaccurate and quite possibly completely fabricated.