Linda Rondstadt, who was recently canned for opening her pie hole for purposes other than singing, is in dire need of our help. She says
It's a real conflict for me when I go to a concert and find out somebody in the audience is a Republican or fundamental Christian. It can cloud my enjoyment. I'd rather not know.
We here at the Sharp as a Marble Institute for Assisting Has Been Performers would like to offer to join the pledge to help Ms. Rondstadt by not actually attending any of her shows.
In these troubled times, the feelings of washed out singers from the 80's are vital to society's well being. It would be a shame to let any of our fundamental Christian or Republican money upset Ms. Rondstadt. So please, do your part!
For pennies a day, you can avoid any musical performance by Linda. Your lack of donation to her business will ensure that Linda will not have to sing in front of crazy bible thumpers and people who think the government should stay out of our lives.
If you won't help, who will?
This message brought to you by Captain Ed and a special grant from the Ipse Dixit Society.
Update from Captain Ed - 100's of people are already doing their part!